married for the past 9 yrs
I'm blessed with 3 kids( 2boys and a girl)
and I have the most amazing hubby..
I'm trying to correct the notion that all
marriages are wacky and all because that's
not true..
It wouldn't be nice if some single girls out
there don't get to know that marriages can
work if u make it happen
I got married 9yrs ago to my hubby
We dated for a year and got married..
My friends were like it was too soon since
we barely know our selves
I was staying in abuja while him in lagos
I just come occasionally to visit him
So after a year
We figured it was time to move to the
next level which was very amazing..
We got married and I started living the life
of a married woman..
We loved each other so much but their
were things we did not know about each
other since it was long distance hence
posed a problem for us..
I had very bad mouth as of that time..
I do like to challenge everyone including
him
Which he didn't like..
We argued a lot which ends up with
several beatings..
The first time my hubby hit me
I ran to my aunt's place and later went
back home
It happened again and again
But the whole thing was after the beating
He comes back to say sorry and to tell me
how the things I said to him really did hurt
and how he's hot tempered and I'm hot
tempered and all...
After a year
I told my self I had to work on my self
I stopped talking too much
Prayed more often and asked God to help
me with my temper
I stopped challenging him and always make
him feel more than superior to me
Like magic
The whole fighting stopped
I took in and gave birth to our twin boys
the second year
I was so engrossed with taking care of the
babies that I forgot to give my hubby the
attention he deserved...
When my babies were 5 month old
I went through my hubby's fone for the
first time and I found out he was cheating
on me..
The girl in question was supposed to be a
family friend but she started sleeping with
my husband..
I went thru the whole bbm chat and saw
the way the girl started flirting with my
hubby and how he tried to resist and how
he finally fell for her tricks
I was mad
I was raged but at the same time I was
determined to be calmed about the whole
thing..
I didn't mention it to him when he came
to pick up his fone cos I would have
insulted him and said so many hurtful
things to him
So I pretended like I saw nothing..
The next day
I started jogging with some neighbours
After 2weeks I got a treadmill and started
using at home..
I was still running in the morning and using
the treadmill at night..
After 3 months I lost the whole baby fat coming back to 60kg which was my initial weight..
I didn't give up
I kept trying to look fit and everything..
One night
My hubby came to me saying we needed
to talk
I was like hope there is no problem? He
said there is!
And I was like lemme hear it
He then opened up to me about his affairs
with that girl..
Told me everything that happened
Even went ahead to show me the whole
chat and how he ended it with the girl and
how she's still calling back and begging for
more
Of course she was gonna beg for more
My hubby is well endowed and gifted (LoL)
He was crying and apologising but I told
him he shouldn't worry
That it was all my fault
I forgot about him and he saw attention
some where else..
We made up and after 2 days
He got me a car out of guilt but I told him
to stop worrying but I still liked the fact
that he got me the car
It was my dream car
We started enjoying our lives the way it
was before
Going to the movies
Club
Hanging out
I gave him all my attention
Even after I gave birth to my baby girl 3yrs
later
He didn't cheat on me bcos I made sure I
didn't stop been a mother
A wife
A lover and friend
As usual
I started exercising again and went back to
my body 4months after my baby was born
We were so blessed
Work was going fine
Home was fine
Now when I say
"Home was fine"
It didn't mean we were not quarreling
We were but I just made sure if I was
gonna quarrel about anything,it was gonna
be something worth it and I tried as much
as possible not to be harsh or rude..
There was a time we quarrelled and
couldn't reconcile immediately like usual
and I went out to tell a male friend of mine
not knowing that was the last thing I
should be doing
The guy was advising me and I felt he was
nice
One day
The same talk came up between me and
my hubby
When we couldn't reconcile
I drove of to that guy's house..
He consoled me and started kissing me..
I was kissing him back and it suddenly
dawned on me,he's not my husband
I couldn't do that to my hubby
I pushed him off and drove back home
Told my hubby he won and told him how I
kissed someone else and he told me he
understands
So we'd drop the case even if I was right
Deleted the guy as a friend and worked on
my marriage..
Since then
We don't stay mad at each other more
than 10mins..
My friends come to the house and they are
like
I envy ur marriage
That we still act as newly weds and all
But what they don't know is its not easy
getting ur family 2geda
Its so hard been a friend
Lover
Best friend
Mistress
Mother
Wife
Sister all in one..
I'm from a broken home so I know what I
and my sister went thru and I didn't want
that for my kids..
So I had to fight to make my home work
I got married when I was 18 and right now
27 But when u see me I look 24
People never believe I'm 27 or a mother
cos I made sure I kept my self looking
good..
My hubby doesn't like the whole idea of
wrapper or anything so I don't have one
except for meetings
I dress in my bum shorts
Mini skirts
Short dresses
Anything to keep me looking good
So at this point I'm going to say
Ladies:
1. Marriage is not easy
2. Don't go into marriage expecting so
much
3. Don't think ur marriage would not have
problems
They will always have
What makes u a woman is the ability to
handle it
4. Make ur partner ur friend
Best friend
Lover
Husband
Father
Brother
With that
he can open up to u all the time
5. Never loose urself because u are
married
He loved what he saw that's why he
married u
Try not to go away from that
6. Never share ur problems with anyone
except ur very sure the person wishes u
well cos if u share it with the wrong person
U would get the wrong advice from them
Handle ur problems within sometimes
7. Do not argue with ur hubby
Let him win if u see its gonna pose as a
problem
8. For those with sharp mouth
Trim it
That's the one thing men hate
It took me time to learn
So please and please
Never challenge ur hubby cos it would
make him feel he's not in control and men
like feeling they are in control even when
actually
Its the women who are in control
9. Talk to him all the time
Appreciate anything he does and
encourage him
10. Don't forget to make God ur number
one..
Don't joke with prayers
It never fails
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